Friday, 22 April 2005

Life... Sdn. Bhd. 3

The night where the stars were no show....

Because they're all (probably) at the Cameronians, which is also held tonight. Nell and Reza were no show. Dunno why, but that's another story.

Thought I won't be there on time so left a bit early cos of the sudden pour of rain after finishing my finals today. Not to also mention the sudden jam getting into the parking lot at BSC. Stupid machines. 

Merchandise-wise I only stuck to the programme and also a poster (RM 3 and RM2 respectively). My theatre kaki decided to get one of those Biggest Pocket tee shirts, which also came with a free poster (which I happily relieved her from haha). So now I've 2 posters, bwahaha. Pity not one was autographed - pah. 

Anyway, it started the same way Life...2 did - with projected montage of images with Eurhythmics's Sweet Dreams and the cast walks on one by one, wearing the Malaysia's Biggest Pocket tee shirts, bla bla bla. 

There were so many stories told tonight, with everyone sharing more than one tale this time, that I am not quite sure where to start. 

I remember Patrick was talking about some discoveries he made about Malaysia, one of which was that men would never buy sanitary napkins (which I think that you wear with a belt) that had to be wrapped in sheets of Chinese newspaper. And those napkins make excellent cloths for polishing one's car (the new, not the used ones - otherwise all there'll be a lot of "red Protons" on the road). Another was about how he used his childhood affliction to pass his driving test, which even I can relate to even though I took mine like 3 years ago (the driving test, not the childhood affliction). Looks like driving tests haven't changed much over the years. And how he wanted to marry a horizontally-challenged Malay chick and how he was afraid to tell his mother and all she had to say was, "Yeung chai (along the lines of "Goat boy")...Cannot eat pork". Like as if pork has ever deterred anyone from marrying before.

(Speaking of the horizontally-challenged, there was one seated in front of me and annoyingly enough, all I saw was the back of her head for the whole 90 minutes. Was squirming in my seat also throughout trying to get past that - should've moved back one row, there was an empty seat behind me. *swears like nuts*)

I thought it was funny when Gavin was talking about how difficult it is for a straight guy to be in a (predominantly) gay local theatre industry (as if the thought of him being gay ever crossed my mind - ha!) - a minority. He ended it by telling the audience to smile at the next straight guy they see on the street. (Ah ha... sure). But all I can do is empathise. And also his earlier tale about his first erection at a young age hanging off a rope and has been hanging off stuff since to get off (to which Patrick said, "No wonder his girlfriends are all tall and got big, big ear" - something like that). That was more a ha-ha moment than a-ha moment (and also a "raised eyebrow" moment, at that).

Ari was (also) going on about his first erection and another piece about stealing money from parents (which I believe, is what most of us go through anyway). The narration was also hilarious, as usual. Small time crooks and cat burglars - haha.

I thought the theme this time round was about family, so was wondering what Ari and Gavin's stories of first erections had anything to do with it.

There were also stories of menarches (which is a bombastic word meaning "first menstruation" lah) but I got the idea of how it relates to the family theme lah - how mothers tend to spread that kind of news to all the family and friends. How malu.

Susan Lankester's piece was about how she finally realized the importance of family - and about her huge extended family of grandparents, and 9 uncles and aunties and their spouses.

Andrew Tan talked about family acceptance of his life partner and Ben Tan the death of a beloved spouse and the sanctity of marriage that those who oppose to same-sex marriages are trying to "preserve". Have to agree with Ben Tan about his reaction to that - "F--- you" to Dubya.

Mary George and her delayed reaction to being unable to go to the fair at age 5, 25 years later.

Moving on to the new additions to the cast:

Fang Chyi and her being matchmade by well-meaning friends and family. Also has a great singing voice. She's also gay.

Samantha Schubert was going on about the erm, joys of child adoption and how she's an adopted child herself. And how she and her husband deals with questions from KPCs (kay poh chees, or busybodies) about their dark-skinned adopted daughter -

KPC: *Looks at kid, looks at parents* "Why you white, the baby black one?"
Reply: "Aiyah, leave her in the sun too long become like that lah"

Sobri Anuar's stories were all in Malay, which I could catch most of. He also managed to make fun of those who didn't pass SPM Malay and the angmo in the audience before he started. He talked about him being of keling (a colloqiual, derogatory term referring to Indians) and Malay blood and how his family was unfairly treated, how his sister's wedding was done by him and 8 other pondans, among other things. Despite the sad stories he still got people laughing because of his effeminity.

Christina Orow related stories of her family and fleeing to Singapore by car, plane and boat.

Story-telling aside, there was also the singing and the dancing - they performed nursery rhymes, Malay and English, the tired and the new. Then an upbeat rendition of the lagi tired Theresa Teng hit, The Moon Represents My Heart (a song which I still can't stand even after that). Somewhere along the way they all started dancing ala-Bollywood dance sequence which I thought wasn't too bad, in all honesty. And again seeing so many people gyrating on stage at the same time made it a bit hard on the peepers.

Overall it was a great show. Never laughed so much and so heartily in a while - left me with tears of laughter.

Cabut-ted straight away (Or at least tried to, cos there was a line of people when paying for parking because of lack of functioning machines, and also in leaving the parking lot) after as I wasn't in the right frame of mind to talk to the cast as they emerged. And again, I forgot to bring along my marker pen (ka ni na), so couldn't get them to sign the poster even if I had WANTED to stay. Least I now know that Samantha Schubert drives a huge-ass family SUV and that Gavin and Ari got a ride from her.

Also have to mention that my theatre kaki's been ducking some of her lecturers who are there to (presumably) show their support to fellow lecturer Mary (George) and also ended up sitting next to one of them and having to make small talk while waiting for the show to start. Better than staring at the back of someone's head for 90 minutes any day. (Frankly, I've not seen/run into any of my lecturers since Pn. F at JHTF 2 - for some reason was hoping to run into H).

Also ran into my senior Wan (Shazrina - hope I got that right, whose now in IGS) who was seated 2 rows in front of me. She asked if Elia was my sister (last time I got that was 6 years ago when the biatch Pn. M asked that also). Told her no and made small talk as we were leaving the auditorium - when she graduating, when I'm leaving the country, bla bla.

Other links:
- The Life...Sdn. Bhd 3 site
- Review posted by Sharon Bakar on, and also
- The Star's review, both of which touched on the reviewer's disgust of the sanitary pads/napkins jokes and agreed that it would've been better if there were fewer performers.